Up again. and back again.

176.

Thanks, stupid food. Extra-sugary and excessive food.

I have several "problems":

1. I love food. Especially sugar. I have a hard time limiting my sugar intake. Very hard time. But I am not touching another piece of birthday cake. Hear me?
   
2. I think I'm invincible. "I won't gain weight if I eat this." And I don't, until I eat too much junk for several days or weeks.
3. I don't really believe that I can (i.e. want to bad enough) maintain a weight/size smaller than I am right now.

I was a size smaller (10/12) than I am right now post-Jenna/pre-Alisa, but other than that, most of my adult life I've been about the same size that I am right now (12/14). However, I'm not doing this just for my waist line (though my waist still needs some work, even if I can fit into my old pants -- ever heard of muffin top?), this is my overall health I'm focusing on. But then I can't shake the thought that I know I can be a size smaller. But then I go right back to not believing I could maintain it if I achieved it (although I maintained a 10/12 for a year before I got prego with Alisa). Or maybe it's that I think "why bother? I'm happy where I'm at."

I've also been overwhelmed for the past two weeks with surgery, Enrichment, teaching preschool, and birthday party, so I've been tired. I eat when I'm tired. I feel discouraged/depressed/apathetic when I'm tired.

I'm back. And hopefully back down again.

Slipping

Thanks to my high-sugar and treats consumption over the last two months, my weight loss has completely stagnated. But thanks to my Body Pump classes, the inches have still been ever-so-slowly coming off.

This last week or two I've found myself in a serious get-in-shape slump. I'm not choosing thin, and I don't care. I know I'm just tired. Mentally and emotionally. But eating ice cream, pop-tarts, M&M's, kisses, brownies, Ghiradelli Pecan Pie chocolate squares around the clock and second helpings at meals? Not very thin-smart. Pretty fluffy-stupid, if you ask me.

But like I said, I don't care! I know I want to turn this thing around, because I am slipping down a slippery hill that I've been working so hard to climb, and I know I'll regret it later, so why can't I choose the little things all day long to keep going uphill? Because I'm tired of climbing and I just want to take a short nap. Or maybe a long nap.

Okay, plan of action:

• green drinks! Go buy spinach.
• throw out the rest of the kisses and ice cream?? I'm not as strong as you, Lara! and I think my family would kill me!
  
• more water.
• clean my house! right after my nap.
  

That's all I can do for today. Any advice, chastising encouragement etc. are most definitely welcome.

Oh, and I'm feeling thrush again. Is that helping me eliminate sugar? Nope, because it's not affecting my baby. If she'd get fussy about it, it might make it easier for me...

Corn Chowder

This has become one of my very favorite soups. Especially in cold winter months.

1/2 cup chopped onion (I use dried onion and add a little water while it's cooking)
1/2 cup green bell pepper
1 Tb cooking oil

Cook onion and bell pepper in hot oil until onion is tender but not brown.

1 can chicken broth (I use chicken bouillon and water)
1 cup cubed, peeled potato

Stir in chicken broth and potato. Bring to boiling, reduce heat. Cover and simmer for 10 minutes.

3 cups frozen corn (I've also used drained canned corn)

Stir in corn. Cook, uncovered, about 10 minutes more or till potato and corn are tender. Stir occasionally.

1 cup milk
1 Tb salt
1/4 tsp pepper
1/4 tsp salt

Combine in a small bowl, then stir into the corn mixture.

2 slices bacon

Crisp-cook, drain and crumble bacon. Add to soup, and stir.

1 cup of soup has: 180 calories, 6 grams fat, and 4 grams of fiber

Options:

• before adding the corn, blenderize half of it to make a thicker soup.
  
• add 1/2 cup shredded cheddar cheese with the bacon.
• add several slices of cut-up ham instead of, or in addition to, the bacon. It makes it a heartier, and more filling meal.
  

Question from a reader:

Do you have any suggestions for when you just can't get full? I have the hardest time feeling satisfied at lunch, and I wind up eating way too much junk.

Well, I am certainly not an expert, but I always love a soap box. ☺

The afternoons are probably my hardest time of the day, too. I think it's because it's my "down" time. JuJu's at school, Lucille's in quiet time, Evy's napping, and I'm kind of tired, which makes me prone to snacking.

A couple of thoughts:

• If you feel hungry, you should eat a real meal. Because if you don't, you will end up snacking all afternoon. Many "experts" suggest eating five small meals a day instead of three large ones. Doing so helps keep your blood sugar up, and keeps you from getting over-hungry, so you feel less inclined to overeat, or snack on unwanted calories between meals.
• Hide the snacks. I have a certain spot on my counter where all my baked goods/treats tend to end up. If I keep them there, I will see them and then eat them all day long, without even thinking about it. Just by putting them elsewhere: in the fridge, on a different counter, etc. helps me not snack on them.
  
• Find a healthy comfort food. Soup, for me, is comfort food. It warms and fills my belly with relatively few calories. I make different soups a couple times a week, and there are always leftovers for lunch the next day.
  
• Have a plan. When you're hungry, what will you eat? For me, that has been my green drinks lately, or leftover soup. If I don't have a plan, I eat anything and everything. A couple of suggestions for what to plan on: high-fiber cereal, celery and peanut butter, almonds and applesauce... any suggestions?
  
• Water, water, water!
• When I was off sugar for thrush reasons, I found that if I was craving sweets, it was typically because I was either hungry or thirsty. Yes, sweets still taste good and make me "happy," but good food and water are what I need.
• Remember that eating sugar makes you want to eat more sugar. Once you start, it's hard to stop.
  
• Brush your teeth. Doesn't really work for me, but it might for you! ☺

Now it's your turn. How would you answer my friend's question?

Green Drinks

My friend Lara recently introduced me to green drinks/smoothies. They are my favorite meal of the day right now. Here is my latest favorite combination:

1 or 2 big handfuls of baby spinach
1/3 cup frozen blueberries
1/3 cup frozen pineapple
1/2 pear
1/2 cup carrots
1/2-1 cup water
1-3 Tb. flax seed

Blend well. According to My Fitness Pal, with 2 Tb. flax seed, this recipe has about 200 calories and 7 grams of fat. (The flax seed supplies 45 calories and 2 grams of fat per tablespoon. Flax seed is really good for you.)

I've used strawberries, but they aren't as sweet, so I have to add pineapple juice concentrate to sweeten it. I've even added frozen peas to this drink. Hippie enough for you? I usually drink one around 11 am, when I'm starting to get hungry. It's a perfect snack for while I'm fixing lunch and getting my daughter to kindergarten. Then I can eat my lunch in peace later.

The thing I like best about this drink is that I'm eating a couple servings of fruits and veggies without even thinking about it. And one less thing to think about is always a good thing around here.

(When I first started drinking these, I had to add a couple teaspoons of sugar to it, but I've gradually gotten used to the taste and depending on what fruit I use, I don't add any sugar any more, and only seldom add pineapple juice concentrate.)

At the risk of looking foolish in your mental images ...

I try to incorporate exercise into my whole day. While I cook, clean, and even brush my teeth, I keep my tummy tight, with a healthy posture through my back and shoulders. When I'm standing still, I do mini leg lifts, or rise up and down on my toes. Is that too dorky? Here's one of my favorite ab strengthening exercises: I stand straight, with my belly tight. Then I lean to the side (like you would if you were playing "I'm a Little Teapot"), but lean from the waist, so your hips stay in the same place, and your upper body bends over. As I lean over, I inhale through my nose, and then, exhaling with exertion, I rise back up straight, using only my ab muscles to lift my body. Does that make sense? Don't make me post a video of myself doing it! :)

I don't know how much of a difference this actually makes in my overall health, but it feels good, and when I feel like my body is "tight," I'm less likely to eat poorly. Just a thought.

Running!

Comment from John on my last post:

I always hated running. I would finally commit, head out, and run some randomly selected distance. Inevitably, I would feel horrible for the next couple of days.

Finally, it dawned on me that maybe I needed to be smart about it. That's when I found Couch to 5K on-line. By the end of the 9 weeks, I was running 3 miles, 3 times a week and I loved it. I felt accomplished, capable, in-shape etc. I went on to run a half-marathon later.

I am a big believer in exercise plans. People tend to believe they are stronger and more fit than they really are. Whatever exercise you pick, work into it slowly and it'll work better.

Me Gusta Mueve, Mueve

Most of my posts so far have been about food choices, but another important key to health and fitness is exercise (oh, and sleep is the other element to health and fitness, but since I'm up way too late writing this, maybe I'm not the best person to talk!).

About 10 years ago, when I still wasn't exercising regularly, I had a doctor comment to me that, in order to thrive, our bodies require: food, water, sleep, and exercise. It was a sort of epiphany moment for me, since I'd always considered exercise optional, like a hobby.

Sports: hated them.
Aerobics: someone else's hobby. Not mine.
Walking: only if I didn't have a car.
Dancing: I liked that, but it was just a casual hobby.
Running: makes my head and lungs hurt. John swears it gets better with practice.
Swimming: No, thanks.
Biking: mmm... maybe.

After I had babv #1, my dear friend and fitness buddy Lucy encouraged me to come try out her "hobby": a dance aerobics class at the gym. I was extremely skeptical, but after trying it a few times, and thinking about it a lot, I finally did it! Within a couple of months, I was in the best shape of my life.

Joining a gym is generally a big commitment. And not a cheap one. Lucy taught me that our health is an investment. I can either invest the time, money, and effort on exercise now, or spend it later on medical care.

The trick with exercise is to find something you genuinely enjoy, and then schedule time for it. Make a standing appointment with your exercise of choice, and do everything you can to keep it. (I'm such a hypocrite with this one, by the way! I'm working on it...)

After baby #2, I joined Curves and actually quit several months later. It wasn't the kind of workout I needed or enjoyed, but I know a lot of people I met there swore by it (in other words, try it, if it's something that appeals to you).

After that, I bought several Firm videos, and those are actually pretty good. However, I personally can't exercise at home. My kids interrupt me, I see dirty dishes I "should" be washing, etc. etc. For me, I need a complete change of scenery, with other people cheering me on, challenging me to do just a few more sit-ups! But that's just me. My friend Caryn works out at home every morning, super early, and that works for her (so in other words, try it before making a commitment to a gym).

I love the gym. I love the friends I make there. I love how it challenges me to do just a little more. I love how I feel when I come home. It's my way of pampering myself with time away from my kids and housework. Love it.

I would easily put my decision to join the gym six years ago in the top 5 best decisions in my life.

That said, it might not be your thing. What is your thing? What has worked for you in the past? What appeals to you now?

¿Te Gusta Mueve, Mueve?

Temptations and Successes

I did it! No cheesecake or pumpkin bread for me yesterday. However, there is still more of both left (guess what you're having for lunch today, Jenna and Alisa!)...

None for me! Thanks for all your fabulous support!

Sugar Confessions

I consumed way too much sugar (yet again) this past weekend. argh.

We still have chocolate chip pumpkin bread and pumpkin cheesecake in our fridge. Now, I want you all to listen to me:

I. am. NOT. going. to. eat. any. (more.) of. it.

I am saving myself for fudge. Do you hear???

Telling someone a goal like this has always helped me to have better restraint. Anything you'd like to publicly state that you won't eat today?

My Fitness Pal

I don't count calories, or track what I eat in any way. I'm too lazy, and not obsessed with losing weight enough. Probably more lazy than anything.

My Fitness Pal is a tool I found that makes it easier for me to track what I'm eating. I tried it almost two years ago, and was very interested to see that I only really went over my suggested calorie intake on days that I ate treats of any kind.

My suggestion? Track what you eat for a couple of days. You might be surprised by what you're eating. It has helped me make better food choices.

Anti-Perfectionism

Several people have commented to me that this is the worst time of year to be off sweets. I say that this is the best time of year to go off sweets, because there are so many to partake of!

Flylady talks a lot about perfectionism and how it literally cripples us. For example, say your house looks like a post-tornado/war/toddler-zone. You know that you'll need an hour of uninterrupted time, not to mention mental and physical energy, to get everything cleaned up. Because you don't have the time or energy to tackle it all right then, what do you do?

Nothing? I have often thrown in the towel in moments like these, because I know I can't make my house "perfect" right then. If I can't do it all, why do anything? Why even start if I can't finish?

Flylady's point is that it doesn't have to be all or nothing. Wouldn't five minutes be better than nothing? This all-or-nothing-perfectionism revelation has changed the way I think about a lot of things.

That's how I look at being off sugar during the holidays, too. Refusing even just a little sugar is better than nothing, right? So what if you can't do it "perfectly" sugar-free! Wouldn't it be better to only consume 2,000 calories worth of fudge this holiday season, rather than 5,000? ☺

For me, eliminating sweets completely makes me feel bitter and rebellious. I don't want to give them up for life. But I do want to cut way, way down. For lots of reasons. For the rest of my life, I will probably be "off" sugar, but still enjoying them a little now and then.

Sugar Hierarchy

My comfort food of choice is sugar. Salty things don't tempt me, but sugar? That's my vice. Whenever I throw myself a piti-party because I'm tired, or my kids are cranky, or I'm feeling busy or stressed, etc., I turn to sugar because "I want/deserve/earned/need a treat." But not just any treat, it has to be worth-it-yummy. And I put a lot of thought into what's considered "worth-it."

For me, there's a sugar hierarchy, from stuff like Smarties and jelly beans at the very yucky bottom, to packaged cookies, then ice cream, pies, and candy bars as you go up. At the top are things like homemade ooey-gooey brownies and chocolate chip cookies. Finally, above it all, as if it's floating in the air, with a glowing halo of light around it, is plain, chocolate fudge. No nuts necessary, forget the frill, just give it to me plain. Mmm...

In a weird way, thinking about it this way helps me choose to not eat any sweets at all. Because if I'm going to splurge (and suffer the "fluffy" consequences), then I want it to be the tastiest thing ever, and that's nothing I can buy on a feeling-pitiful-impulse. It has to be homemade (which can't be impulsive). Or fudge. And lucky for me, you can't get fudge from a drive-thru.

What's your vice? Can you replace it with something less impulsively-accessible?

Thanksgiving Blues

So, you know how I went off sugar? Yeah. I didn't do so well over Thanksgiving. My mom made two pumpkin rolls! And I made pumpkin and blackberry pies! And my friend made pecan cheesecake pie! The fork practically shoveled itself into my mouth.

And after all was said and eaten, I felt "fluffy" again. argh.

So this is my thinking: sure, it tasted good while it was in my mouth, and even for a few minutes afterwards, but eventually, the taste goes away, and all you're left with are the calories. And yes, the pies and pumpkin rolls were yummy, but not that yummy. Not worth-it-yummy, for sure.

I'm back off sugar, and feeling less fluffy, now that I don't have any treats in the house.

A New Way to Eat

I mentioned in a previous post that thin is a choice and a lifestyle. I don't want to have to think about my eating choices (i.e. be on a diet) every day for the rest of my life, in order to stay at a size I feel comfortable in. I want to have healthy habits in place so I don't have to think about it. For example:

• Eat more whole grain: whole wheat bread, brown rice, oatmeal, and whole wheat pasta.
  
• Eat more fruits and veggies. I try to prepare two vegetables with every dinner. Dr. Phil's suggestion was to divide your plate: FIll half your plate with non-starchy veggies, 1/4 of your plate with a starchy carb, and 1/4 of your plate with a lean protein.
• I drink only water. I don't like milk, except on cereal (or with ooey-gooey brownies!!), and I don't think diet soda is good for you. We have juice occasionally, but I try to serve fruit instead.
• I am off sugar right now, but it's mainly so I can keep nursing Evy. (I was feeling the thrush sensations I'm all-too-familiar-with return.) My ultimate goal with sugar is to be satisfied with a small, occasional treat. I love them too much to think I could give them up completely. I used to avoid sugar all week and let myself enjoy them on the weekends. That worked for me for a while. Eliminating any sugar from your diet will benefit you and your waistline, not to mention your overall health. When I'm off sugar, my stomach feels so much happier, my brain feels clearer, and I feel more energetic.
  
• Check out the following list from Dr. Phil's book. The point of this list, in my view, is to see that the small choices we make every day can have a big impact on our long-term weight maintenance.

• Have a plan: a substitute food or activity for a weight-gaining behavior. For example, low-fat popcorn instead of chips. Brush your teeth to avoid night-time eating. Chew gum, go on a walk, take a shower, etc.
  
• Allow yourself that occasional splurge. I ate pumpkin pie on Thanksgiving. And not just one piece. If I never splurge, I get bitter and then I rebel. This is not a diet. This is my life, and I want to eat sweets. They just need to be in moderation. I'm still working on the moderation thing. And probably will be forever!
  

Most importantly, don't try to tackle it all at once. Pick one habit you want to implement, and work on that until you're pretty good at it. Then pick another one to work on. If you try to take on too much, you'll get burned out and discouraged.

Scribbit wrote a fabulous post about her healthy-lifestyle tips here.

Get-Real Weight

I'm a fan of Dr. Phil. I was even on his show once. Well, I was in the audience and they showed my picture twice, and that's as close to being on his show as I ever hope to be. Unless, of course, he's giving me a week-long spa vacation in Hawaii for being such a wonderful person.

His book, "The Ultimate Weight Solution Food Guide" has what I consider the most reliable Body Weight Guide I've ever seen.

Most Body Weight Charts I've seen say that as a 6' tall female, I should weigh around 150-160. After I had JuJu, I worked hard and got to what I felt like was a great size and weight for me: 170 and a loose 12. That's my goal now, and even though I'm 6 pounds from that weight, I'm a size 14, so I still have several inches to lose.

What's your Get-Real Weight?

Granola

Erin asked for my unsweetened granola recipe. A few months ago, when I was trying to find things to eat that didn't have sugar, I looked online and found recipes made with apple juice concentrate, dried fruit, and artificial sweeteners. On a yeast-free diet, at least in the beginning stages, you aren't supposed to eat sugar in any form, including fruit. So I just made my favorite granola recipe and omitted the sugar. I posted my two favorites here and here. In the end, I started adding just a little sugar, up to about 1/4 of the total sugar. I will never make it with all the sugar again, though, because I prefer it with less.

Off Sweets?

Lara the Lazy Organizer suggested we go off sweets together. Which I was already sort of planning on doing, thanks to the thrush symptoms I've felt the last few days. Blech. Ick. Ugh. Argh. Grrr.

I hate being off sweets. I feel so deprived. Then I rebel, and it's not pretty. The thing is ... I feel so in control when I'm off sugar. It's almost like I can think more clearly. So why I wouldn't want to feel this way all the time, is beyond me.

Anyway, I thought I'd post a list of some of the foods I ate that helped me make it through the 2 months I was off sugar this summer.

• Celery and natural peanut butter - yum
• I learned that when I was craving sweets, it was usually because I was hungry. So I would eat a sandwich, or a breakfast burrito, or any type of substantial meal (not snacky) and then I wouldn't be hungry, and the craving was more or less gone.
• If I felt really deprived, I would "splurge" with a Whopper Jr. It filled me up and was tasty, so I felt like I was spoiling myself.
• Plain Cheerios with vanilla soymilk. When you aren't eating sugar, the 1 gram of sugar in Cheerios tastes plenty sweet. And the vanilla soymilk tastes sweeter than regular milk. (I'm slightly lactose-intolerant, and I just prefer soymilk now.)
• Almonds
• Rice Crackers with Garden Vegetable Cream Cheese

The thing is, I was eating lots of things considered "high-fat," and maybe not recommended for weight-loss, but because I had to cut out so many things (thanks the yeast-free diet I was on) I was losing weight like crazy.

From the middle of July to the middle of August I lost 10 pounds. In the second sugar-free month, I lost 8 pounds. And then, the thrush was gone, and I more or less plateaued for 2 months. Because all of a sudden I allowed myself to eat all the usual snacky things that I enjoy.

The trick is to have foods that you love on hand for when you get a sugar craving. Drink some water. Eat some real food. Take a shower. It will pass. At least that's what I'll tell myself as I dive head first into a yeast-free diet again. Argh.

Keep On Keepin' On

I struggle to remember that even when I have a rotten weekend such as this last one, that it's not as if all my efforts for the past several months are lost. So I ate a few hundred extra calories. Maybe even 1000 extra calories. So what! I don't beat myself up, I don't even try to "make up for it" at the gym. I just keep on keepin' on. Measuring myself tonight was very encouraging. Even though I ate like a not-thin person this weekend, I have worked hard and am still slightly smaller than I was a few weeks ago.

Keep on keepin' on!

I Choose Thin!

I am a very judgmental person. Sometimes when I'm in the grocery store and I see someone who is grossly overweight, I can't stop myself from looking in their grocery cart!! (Will you still be my friend now that you know one of my sins?) And 99 times out of 100 it is full of soda (diet or regular), boxed foods, frozen meals, and sweets. And then, just to be judgmentally fair, I sneak a peak in the carts of thin, in-shape people. Lots of fresh fruits and veggies, high-fiber cereals, and whole-grain breads and pastas.

I have thought a lot about this strange "coincidence" I've found at the grocery store. Thin is a lifestyle. Dieting doesn't work. Consistently choosing THIN is the only way to be so.

Here are a few of my THIN mantras and rules:

• Nothing tastes as good as thin feels.
• In the words of my friend Caryn: "it helps if you get used to eating foods that aren't super yummy for most of your breakfasts and lunches. They're still good, just not taste bud bustin' good ... it's not like we entertain ourselves with a daily trip to Disney land... so why would we dazzle our taste buds at every opportunity? If it's delicious, I want to eat MORE of it!" One thing that I eat is oatmeal for breakfast. It's not "taste-bud bustin' good", but good enough, and it's good for me. I put as little sugar as I can stand, and add lots of cinnamon and nutmeg (which make it taste sweeter).
  
• Sweets are an occasional indulgence. Key word is "occasional".
• If I goof up, even numerous times over a few days -- like this Halloween weekend -- I start over right away! Or maybe a better way to say it is "I keep going with my healthy lifestyle" -- since I'm not on a diet, I'm living! And if I want to be fit and thin I don't wait until "next week" or even "tomorrow", I start over keep living the vida THIN right away. "That KitKat (or 5, or 10 mini KitKats, as the case may be) was divine. Yum! What healthy meal should I plan for dinner?"

I choose thin!